"The Lord works in mysterious ways"

My nana always says that quote in my title. Everything happens for a reason. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, given the stuff that's been going on.

Firstly, my sweet little baby is still having difficulties so I drove her back home to see the vet she used to see when I lived with my parents. He's much friendlier than the vets here in SF and more open minded about what could be wrong or going on with her. It also doesn't hurt that some of his costs are half what I'd paid at the SF vet. I'm definitely not wealthy and if I can be charged less, it means I will have more money for medicine or whatever else it is she needs.

I'm so tired right now so I apologize for how this is written.

Christmas came and went. I went to Christmas Mass and prayed for her to get better. I took her home and then shuttled her back and forth twice a day to the animal hospital to get shots. From there, we went to my parents' house, where I dropped her off at the vet she's with now, and a brief Monday Christmas, then flew to Southern California to visit with my grandparents. I was only there for about 1.5 days, but it was a nice visit and got to see some family I hadn't seen in a while.

I flew back up to my parents' place and left with my babies and my friend back to the city, where we went to a NYE party. We'd bought the tickets earlier in December, so even though I wasn't really feeling it, I kinda had to go. Turns out I had fun. It's the first NYE that I actually got to kiss my boyfriend at midnight. I also had the most alcohol I'd ever had in one night--two and a half drinks lol.

As kind of an aside, I don't always think I'm all that attractive, but when I saw the way my boyfriend's face lit up when he saw me all dressed up in my NYE outfit that I threw together at the last minute, I felt like a little tipsy princess. Thank God for $10 H&M dresses. :) Also, thank God for good guys.

So my friend from back home stayed with me for that whole weekend and we hung out and watched my little ones (she also has birds) and then on Monday I went back to work after not having been for two weeks of vacation.

I don't know if it was due to being outside on NYE, all the stress of traveling, not sleeping, going back to work, or what, but by Tuesday evening I was sick. Kinda hit me fast and hard. I'm still recovering from the cold right now.

Anyway, here's what I'm unsure about. On Wednesday night as I was leaving for the grocery store, I asked my friend/roommate if she wanted anything and after responding, told me that she needed to talk to me about something that I wasn't going to like. I thought it was going to be about something I'd done, like not running the dishwasher or taking out the trash. She ended up telling me she and her boyfriend are looking for places to move in together, which essentially means I need to move for the third time in the span of a year.

Thanks a lot, friend.

I never mentioned it here, but I moved to the city back in Feb/March of last year, had a horrendous living situation with a landlord who harassed everyone in the house, and moved out as fast as I could into the place I'm in now when shit really started hitting the fan. I moved in here at the end of July. My good friend was having trouble because her roommate was leaving because their lease was up and she wanted to stay here longer and was freaking out about her own living situation. That's when she invited me to look for housing together and eventually I just moved into her apartment, which was now month-to-month now that their initial year lease was up.

Anyway, I feel really gypped. She's known her boyfriend all of five months and me for two years. She knows everything I've been through with housing and when we moved in together assured me that I wouldn't have to move for a while, that I could finally settle down. Now, in my fifth month here, she's telling me I have to go through the moving process yet another time on top of all the other things that are going on. Then, somehow thinking this will make me feel better, she has the nerve to tell me that this is exactly what her former roommate had done to her. Bull effing shit! They lived together as roommates for at least two years, maybe three. She had time to suspect that her roommate and his SO would be moving in together at some point since they'd been dating 2 years. She had at LEAST a year to live in the place we're in now. This is NOTHING like what happened to her.

On the one hand, I'm furious at the situation. On the other hand, I'm furious at the situation.

Actually, not really anymore. I've mostly calmed down, although I don't really appreciate her trying to be nicer to me. Right now I'm just trying to channel my frustration into something positive. I've always wanted to live by myself. I've always had to share housing and rely on other people (roommates) to live where I'm living. Now I finally get a chance to search for a place where I can live by myself and not have to rely on others to make it so I don't have to move.

The thing that sucks the most, though, is that it's going to cost a huge amount of money. The city is expensive and I might move back to the other side of the Bridge. There's more parking, it's cheaper, and best of all, it's where my bf lives. I really don't know where I'm going to end up and I hate this feeling. I'm also afraid that property managers will see my address history, take one look at how many times I've moved in the past year, and reject my rental application. I desperately do not want to do the roommate thing again. Time and time again, experience has proven I can't trust people I don't know and I can't trust people I do know as roommates. For now I just want to rely on myself, and that's it.

With that, I'm going to sleep. My sinuses are killing me. X_x G'night y'all.