My friend and I are going to this concert in the summer and it turns out this band called Mayer Hawthorne is also on the bill. A former bf (from the entry where he IM'd me and called me baby and I ran away from the IM lol) is working and possibly traveling with that group as one of his recent gigs so I may end up running into him. I'm not sure I know what I'd do if that happened. I have a history of never seeing a BF in person after we've broken up. I talk to one every so often online, but never actually see them face to face. I've definitely avoided this one like The Plague. I'm not even sure that I'd be able to act like a normal person if I saw him in front of me. I've changed a lot since I was 25 and in "love" with him, but seeing him may bring me back to the (more) awkward girl I was back then.
WHY GOD WHY? etc
I keep running these scenarios through my head where I see him but play it cool by teasing him about the sound for the opening band being bad (which would be partially his responsibility) to scenarios where I go diva on him and give him attitude for treating me the way he did while we were together. He was 25 at the time we dated, too, so maybe he's learned some lessons himself. Even though I was extremely disappointed by the way things ended, deep down I always wanted to at least be friends with him--but NEVER on his terms. I wanted him to apologize and WANT to be my friend rather than being my friend because it was convenient for him. No matter what shit he pulled, I'd just want to be given the opportunity to forgive him because he was sorry. Face to face, not over instant message.
At least I have an incredibly smart and attractive boyfriend now. He's almost five years younger than me and has a lot of learning to do, but I guess I don't mind too much being a cougar. It's just too bad he's getting his MA in England and won't be in town for the concert.
In other news, because of this potentially uncomfortable situation, the ex bf's new code name is Mayor Baby or Baby Mayor. Haven't really decided yet.
January 19, 2012
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Ha-ha! You're a cougar! (Sorry. I should say something supportive, but that made me laugh and this new notebook is giving me head and finger aches.)
ReplyDeletelol Yep, I am a cougar. You know, you can get a USB keyboard for your laptop. They sell them for like $10 at Bed Bath and Beyond and probably Target or Walmart. They look kind of cool because they're rubber and floppy and I think you can even spill stuff on them. Not sure if they actually work well or not but they do look cool.
ReplyDeleteRubber and floppy sounds good and spill-proof sounds really good. I was going to just plug in my old desktop's keyboard, but several of the keys have gone missing. I can probably get used to this one too, but it's kinda rough on the pinkies.
ReplyDelete